The past few months have been very stressful, hectic and a rather low time for me, and the reason I have not kept up with my writing. I have been feeling overwhelmed, run down,It has been an adjustment period to say the least. First with my step-dad passing, then my mom’s progressive decline with Alzheimer’s disease and having to be placed in a home, then getting custody of my fiancé Mark’s two young children. I must say, although I have grown to love them dearly it has definitely changed my life (and theirs) a great deal. I was also dealing with a lot of stress from work.
In the happiest times of my life, I have always put God first. Recently though, with all the changes in my life, I seemed to have forgotten or didn’t seem to have time for my daily gratitude and meditation rituals. As I was reaching the point where I felt like my life was spiraling out of control, as it has before, I realized that I haven’t been doing the one thing that I know is so important for living a healthy, joyful, spiritual life. I had not been connecting with God.
Thankfully, I reached out. I sat down and I prayed. I asked Him to take back control of my life, I thanked Him for all the blessings in my life, and apologized for putting Him on the back burner.
IMMEDIATELY I began to see Him appear in everything I did. He was on Facebook in a friend’s message, He was in a movie I sat down to watch, He was in a book I was asked to review for a friend. Luckily I recognized it, and luckily I embraced it and now, once again give thanks for every moment in my day.
A short time later during some vacation time from work, my fiancé Mark and I made plans to go camping for a few days. The kids were with their mom so I knew it would be a good time for me to de-stress and relax which was exactly what I needed. We were first going to spend the time at a Camp-In-Town campground so we could have all the modern conveniences. As luck would have it, or as God planned it, “there was no room at the inn”, so we made the decision to stay at a near by lake. The little lake we chose was deep in the woods with nothing in sight but the trees. No hookups, just nature, unplugged and untouched. It was beautiful and so peaceful.
The first couple of days I spent some quality time with my sister, who has been going through some major life changes of her own. Mark and I also had time to be a couple again, and enjoy each others company. The last couple of days I had a lot of time alone to reflect, as Mark was working during the day.
I picked up a book, which I haven’t done in months, and reading is one of my favorite things to do. And wouldn’t you know it, God was in that book too!
I spent time outside, sitting in the sun, and listening to the sounds of nature and marveling at the beauty and peacefulness all around me.
In that peacefulness, I realized that everything that had happened to me recently was all part of His great plan. It was meant to teach me to value my family, especially my new found family.
Since my divorce I was used to being on my own and having time for me, doing anything I wanted and having no one to answer to or be responsible for, but I was lonely.
I prayed to have a good man come in to my life. I wanted someone who would love me deeply and be a committed partner, someone who would stand beside me, someone I could grow, prosper and make lifetime goals with. I also prayed that I would have a second chance at being a mom because I had been missing my step-son and don't see him often enough. Ask and you shall receive! Not long after Mark, Hailey and Tyson came into my life. They are exactly what I had prayed for! I have a family again that I love and adore. ME time has become WE time, and sitting in the silence, in the middle of nowhere, God showed me that… and I am eternally grateful!